I’m not one of those perfectly racked women. My right boob is small like a mosquito bite. My left boob is long, twice the size of her sister and pointy like a torpedo. Since the 6th grade I’ve worn a bra (almost) every day - until last year. Last year, I lived every day free-boobed, and I don’t plan on wearing a bra any time soon.
Why would I forego this (seemingly) essential article of clothing? How did living free-boobed lead to feeling empowered? How did I handle the (you guessed it) comments from men? Nipples are distracting, do I really want to be attracting that curious gaze? This wasn’t about that curious gaze, this was about me. About me being an outcast and embracing who I am, so others can embrace who they are. So let’s get into it.
My first time wearing a bra was after a suggestion by my mother after a track meet in elementary school. I went to the store and tried on the first of many chest strap contraptions I would continue to wear throughout the next 18 years of playing sports. I would have nightmares about showing up to the gym for a game to find myself bra-less on the court before tip off. So, I get it, strapping the girls in while jumping and running around is a key to some sports. Although I no longer play basketball or run so I have no practical reason for strapping them down. I find my movement in activities that conveniently don’t require jumping or running - I found solace in biking, yoga and walking. These activities do not require any bra to feel comfortable and do my best.
The times I wore a “regular bra” was to even out my rack under a tee shirt. And It’s impossible to find a fitting bra - a cup size that fits my left will always gap on the right. I’ve never seen photos of boobs like mine - or in person. I have a couple photos topless, one I’m doing my hair in the mirror and the other I’m flashing the camera with my tongue out standing in a marijuana tree garden and it’s always interesting to see them from a perspective other than straight on. C say’s it’s like being with two different women, she’s sweet like that.
What I’ve found is (for me) it’s easier to adjust to the free-boobed life in the winter - when layers are required daily. In the summertime - when the women wear a lot of skin - going free-boobed seems more vulnerable, only a thin layer of cotton in-between the world and my uneven, unrepresented rack. One time I had an interaction with a guy I was working with. He walked into the room and laughs and says, "I’m sorry I just want to pinch your nipples, they’re just staring right at me." I turned around and he continued, "Oh come on, you’re like my sister, I can say things like that." I wore a jacket the rest of the day because he made me feel weird. I don’t work with him anymore. Otherwise, nobody said anything - to my face about my boobs, although they always seemed on my mind.
At first it was weird to feel them jiggle around. A year later, I purposefully make them jiggle all around walking down stairs, changing clothes or bouncing in place.
This awareness came to me on Instagram, I came across a page #FreeTheNipple check out their website http://freethenipple.com for more information if you’re into the global movement of equality, empowerment and freedom.
Part of my self-love self-care routine includes a weekly loving breast massage using THC & CBD oil from Bosm. It smells lovely and I either feel energized and detox-ified or I feel relaxed before bed. Either way I make sure to show the ladies how much I love them.